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  She looked around the room. ‘This is a lovely room. It seems strange, but I don’t think I’ve ever been in this house more than a few times over the years,’ she murmured. ‘I would go to the back entrance when I had messages to pass on from my father, and your housekeeper would slip me a cookie or a fruit tart if she’d been baking. I think it’s down to her that I developed the urge to learn to cook.’

  He smiled. ‘Harriet’s still with us, though she works fewer hours now. I’m very fond of her. She took me under her wing and helped me a lot after my mother died. She became like a second mother to me.’

  Ellie nodded. ‘I remember how kind she was.’ She hesitated. ‘I noticed there are some pictures of your mother around the room. You couldn’t have been very old when she died.’

  ‘No. I was ten or eleven.’

  Ellie’s heart went out to that young boy who must have been through so much anguish. ‘That must have come as a real shock to you.’

  ‘Yes, it did, though she’d been ill for some time, and I remember wishing that I knew more about medicine so that I could make her better.’

  Ellie laid her hand gently on his arm. ‘I can’t imagine how awful that must have been for you.’

  His expression was wistful, acknowledging her compassion. ‘Perhaps there was a silver lining, after all. I guess that’s what made me decide to become a doctor.’

  She nodded and let her hand slide away from him. ‘How did your father react to that decision? I imagine he would have preferred you to stay here and run the estate when you were of age.’

  ‘That’s right, he did. It caused a few problems to begin with. But, going back, I think my mother’s passing had a huge effect on my father. He became bitter and more intolerant of other people.’

  ‘I think I can see how that would happen.’ So perhaps that was why he’d let her father go without a second thought?

  The door opened then and to her dismay Lord Birchenall came into the room. He had steel-grey hair and regular features, and Ellie noticed that he walked with a slight stoop.

  ‘James,’ he said, then stopped suddenly as he saw Ellie standing there. ‘Ah, I thought I heard voices.’ He looked her over, his dark eyes assessing, missing nothing. ‘I don’t think I have had the pleasure,’ he said with a smile. He glanced towards his son, clearly expecting an introduction.

  James inclined his head a fraction. ‘This is Ellie,’ he responded. ‘She’s changed quite a lot over the years, so you perhaps won’t remember her but she’s John Saunders’s daughter.’

  Lord Birchenall stiffened. His jaw clenched and he turned his attention back to Ellie, saying tersely, ‘I can’t imagine why you would show your face here after the piece your brother wrote about us.’ His breath rasped in his lungs, and the colour rose alarmingly in his cheeks.

  She was taken aback by the vehemence of his words but she tried to ignore his obvious hostility. ‘I haven’t read the article,’ she said, ‘but I do understand that it must have been upsetting for you.’

  He gave a snort of derision.

  Ellie pulled in a deep breath and started again. ‘I came here to apologise for my brother’s actions. I don’t think he thought things through. You must understand that he feels a lot of resentment towards you after what happened to our father. I think he seized an opportunity to tip the scales, as it were.’

  Lord Birchenall’s brows rose sharply in angry disbelief and she hurried to add, ‘I’m not condoning what he did in any way, but I’m just trying to explain what might lie behind it.’

  ‘Why would he choose to do this now, after all this time?’

  Ellie moved restlessly, suddenly uncomfortable. ‘I think it was because James...because your son started to work at the hospital with me. It has thrown us into close contact after all this time, and it seems to have stirred everything up again.’

  She hesitated then went on. ‘Noah was quite young when my father lost his job and it had a huge effect on him. Perhaps now, as an adult, he felt the need to express his feelings. But I realise that you’ve been ill and I’m sorry that he hurt you.’

  ‘Hmmph.’ Clearly Lord Birchenall wasn’t appeased. His eyes narrowed on her. ‘I remember you now. You’re that wayward little madam who ran amok through the village, getting into all sorts of trouble after you left here. I suppose you’ll say that was my fault, too?’

  Ellie’s face paled. It was true her behaviour had deteriorated badly when their family life had fallen apart. But she hadn’t been expecting that full-on assault and she didn’t know how to answer him.

  James stepped forward. ‘Ellie came here to apologise,’ he said in a quiet reprimand. ‘I don’t see that there’s any need to add more fuel to the fire.’

  Lord Birchenall ignored him and pressed on. ‘Your father simply didn’t do his job properly,’ he told her. ‘He was warned what would happen if his work didn’t improve, but he chose to ignore those warnings.’ He struggled to get his breath. ‘Whatever happened is on his head.’

  Ellie braced her shoulders. She was very conscious that this man was unwell, and she didn’t want to exacerbate that situation in any way, but she was goaded into defending her father.

  ‘He worked for you for many years without a problem. If his behaviour became erratic after that, there had to be a reason and the truth is he was ill. That’s what caused things to go wrong, and being dismissed and thrown out of his house with no means of fending for his family led him on a downward spiral.’

  His mouth flattened. ‘I’d have expected you to make excuses for him.’

  He turned away from her, glancing at his son. ‘I came in here to tell you that Sophie phoned earlier when you were out.’ Becoming unsteady on his feet, he began to reach behind him for a chair, and James came forward to lend him a supporting arm.

  He sat down, taking a moment to pull air into his lungs. ‘She’s upset about the article, too, so I persuaded her to come along and have dinner with us. We’ll have to do our best to sort things out.’

  James frowned. ‘I’m sure Sophie won’t be upset for long.’

  Ellie’s stomach clenched involuntarily. He didn’t seem too concerned. Maybe he was confident enough in his relationship with his girlfriend to be certain he could smooth things over with her. That thought made her feel strangely out of sorts.

  ‘I think I’d better go,’ she said, putting down her empty glass. ‘I have to pick up Jayden from a friend’s house.’

  ‘Of course.’ He glanced at her left hand and must have seen that it was bare of rings. He seemed puzzled, but she was in no mood to explain things, especially with his father looking on.

  She wasn’t sure quite what she’d achieved by coming here. Lord Birchenall was still aggrieved, and it looked as though she was in the way because James was about to get ready to greet his girlfriend.

  ‘Goodbye, Lord Birchenall.’

  He nodded. ‘Goodbye, Miss Saunders.’

  ‘It’s actually Dr Saunders,’ James murmured, but his father didn’t bother to acknowledge that comment.

  James took Ellie lightly by the elbow and led her to the hallway. ‘I’m sorry about the way my father spoke to you,’ he said as they walked to the door.

  ‘It’s all right.’ His hand on her arm was comforting, and for one wild moment she wished she could turn to him and let him soothe away all her problems. Of course, it would never happen.

  James gazed down at her. ‘He’s always been very forthright—I’m afraid it’s a quality that can be both a blessing and a curse.’

  ‘Yes, I imagine it is.’ She half turned towards the door. ‘Goodbye, James.’

  ‘Goodbye.’ He held open the door for her and she stepped out onto the porch. She was desperate to leave.

  More and more she was seeing that it had been a mistake to come here. Perhaps in a naive way she had
been hoping for some kind of redemption, but instead she felt more dejected than ever.

  It was odd, because she had no idea why she was feeling that way.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  ‘WHEN’S MY MUMMY coming home?’ Jayden spooned breakfast cereal into his mouth and looked at Ellie with wide grey eyes.

  Ellie made a small start. Her thoughts had been far away, with James and the way her body responded to his slightest touch. It was disturbing to have so little control over her emotions and she would have to guard against that. After all, he had a girlfriend. It ought not to have bothered her to discover that, but it had.

  She met Jayden’s innocent gaze and decided it was best to be truthful. ‘I’m not sure,’ she told him. ‘But she’s feeling a lot better now, and once the new baby is born it won’t be long before they’ll both be able to come home.’

  He pulled a face. ‘Why can’t she leave it at the hospital?’

  Ellie’s brows shot up. ‘Do you want her to do that?’

  He nodded.

  ‘But why?’

  ‘I don’t want Mummy to have a baby,’ he said, wriggling his shoulders. ‘Why can’t she just give it to a nurse?’

  ‘Um, I really don’t think she would want to do that.’ She looked at him in consternation. ‘Are you sure you don’t want a little brother or a sister? After all, it might be quite nice for you when it’s a bit older. You’ll have someone special to play with.’

  He wrinkled his nose. ‘I don’t want anyone else to play with. I like playing with Josh.’

  ‘Well, I’m glad you get on well with him,’ she said. Jayden went to school with Josh, her neighbour’s child, every day, so it was good that they’d forged such a strong friendship.

  She stood up and affectionately stroked his hair. This was a difficult one, and maybe it was something she had better not share with his mother just yet. The way things were going, she might have a few days yet to bring him round to accepting the status quo.

  A short time later she dropped him off at her neighbour’s house and kissed him goodbye. Molly was good with children and she knew she could relax, leaving her to take him and Josh to nursery school.

  Jayden’s reluctance to accept the new baby was on her mind, though, as she drove to work, and when she arrived at A and E she told Olivia what he’d said.

  ‘At least he’s come out into the open with it,’ Olivia commented. ‘It could be worse, I suppose, if he were to bottle it all up. You hear such stories about children being jealous of their siblings.’

  Ellie nodded in agreement. ‘I wish I could find some way to help him get over it.’

  At least her discussion with Jayden had helped take her mind off the meeting she had to attend later that morning. Amelia Holt was coming to the hospital so that they could discuss her complaint, and every time she thought about it, her insides lurched. No matter how convinced she was that she’d done everything possible to save Mel’s aunt, if this complaint was taken further to a second hearing there was always the chance that her career could be badly damaged.

  Through the course of the morning she became more and more apprehensive. James had said he would be with her when the time came, and that helped, but it also added to her confusion. Her emotions were all over the place where he was concerned.

  She forced herself to concentrate on her work and later, as she was passing by one of the treatment rooms, she saw that James was working on his own in there.

  He was talking to his patient, a man who had been vomiting and was now struggling to breathe. It was clear that James was doing his best to make him feel better. Beads of sweat had broken out on the man’s brow. He looked very ill and as though he was in great pain, and Ellie could see from the monitors that his heartbeat was very fast and his blood pressure was dropping.

  All the time James was gentle and supportive and Ellie stood still for a moment, struck by his caring manner.

  Then, all at once, things started to change. The man appeared to collapse suddenly and monitors all around him started to make shrill bleeping sounds. Ellie hurried into the room.

  ‘Would you like some help?’ she asked.

  ‘Thanks.’ James was reaching for the intubation equipment.

  ‘What are we dealing with here?’

  ‘I suspect from his history that it’s acute pancreatitis—he was complaining of abdominal pain and continual vomiting.’ He frowned. ‘He looks anorexic.’

  ‘Yes, he does, except for the swelling of his abdomen.’

  ‘Will you put in a nasogastric tube?’ James asked as soon as the patient was intubated. ‘He’s been vomiting so much I need to be sure he’s not going to choke.’

  She nodded. ‘I will.’

  She set to work, and as soon as he was sure that the man was receiving adequate oxygen and was connected to the ventilator, James prepared his patient and began to insert two central lines so that he could be given medication and other essential substances.

  ‘He’s dehydrated,’ he said. ‘At this rate, his kidneys will start to fail—we need to get him on normal saline right away.’

  She nodded. ‘I’ll set up a drip. Has he had a painkiller?’ She checked the man’s notes. His name was David Langley and within the last month he’d been to his GP complaining of abdominal pain.

  ‘I’m doing that now. I’m going with meperidine.’

  Watching him at work, Ellie could see why he’d reached the level of consultant. He was exceptionally skilful and thorough in everything he did. She sighed inwardly. If only she could share some of his calm expertise. Ever since Grace Holt had died, she had begun to question everything she did. Even something like placing a catheter could be hazardous if the correct sterile techniques weren’t followed.

  ‘Are you okay with helping me?’ James was watching her, and she guessed he was wondering about her hesitation.

  ‘Yes. I’m all right.’

  She dragged her thoughts back to the task in hand and started to insert a catheter into the man’s arm. As soon as that was done, she set up the saline bag, hooking it up to a metal stand. Then she connected the IV tubing to the catheter and checked that the infusion was working correctly.

  Once they had seen to their patient’s immediate needs, James said, ‘I’ll get a CT scan done. It’s possible that gallstones have passed into the bile duct and caused the inflammation, but from his condition I suspect there’s a lot more going on here.’

  ‘Like what?’

  ‘Maybe an abscess and certainly general inflammation. If that turns out to be the case, we’ll have to drain it, but I’m going to give him a strong antibiotic as a precaution. I’m pretty sure there’s an infection of some sort. Anyway, I’ll take him along to Radiology.’

  He glanced at her. ‘You’re very quiet. Are you sure you’re all right?’

  ‘I’m fine.’

  ‘Good.’ He scanned her features a moment longer as though he still had some doubts. ‘As soon as I’ve finished here, I’ll help you prepare for the meeting with Miss Holt. Whatever happens, remember that you did the right thing. It’s not your fault that her aunt died.’

  She nodded. For a few minutes as they’d worked she’d been able to forget about it, but now her anxiety had come back with full force.

  He glanced at his watch. ‘It’s not for another hour yet. We should have plenty of time.’

  He went off to Radiology with Mr Langley, while Ellie returned to her own patients.

  When it was almost time for the meeting, she handed over to another registrar and went to seek out James once more. She was feeling jittery and wishing their appointment was over and done with.

  ‘Do you have Mr Langley’s results?’ she asked.

  James nodded. ‘Yes, I have the radiology report and some of the lab tests are back. Alongside the bile
duct obstruction there’s a large abscess resulting from infection of fluid that has collected in the abdomen.’

  He glanced at the patient’s chart. ‘I’ve put in a drain tube to draw off the infected matter and called for a surgical consultation. A renal specialist is going to come down and look at him, too.’

  She frowned. ‘He’s not doing very well, is he?’

  ‘No.’ He shook his head. ‘I’ve arranged for him to be transferred to Intensive Care as soon as we can manage it.’ He glanced at her. ‘You’re very pale. Are you worried about seeing your schoolfriend?’

  ‘I don’t think she thinks of herself as a friend any longer.’ She guessed he could read her body language and she made an effort to calm herself. ‘I’m a bit apprehensive,’ she admitted. ‘I’ve been trying not to think about it all morning.’

  He lightly squeezed her hand. ‘I’ll be there with you,’ he said. ‘Between us, we should be able to persuade the woman that there’s no case to pursue.’

  ‘I hope so.’ She appreciated him trying to cheer her up. It made her feel a lot better, but she wasn’t as confident as he was that Amelia would be easily appeased. She’d always been a volatile, over-emotional person and her love for her aunt had made her fiercely defensive.

  ‘Try not to worry.’

  ‘I’ll try.’ She glanced at him. His smile was encouraging, coaxing her to have faith, and it warmed her inside to know that he was such a caring, thoughtful man. How was it that he could be so different from his father?

  She hesitated as he glanced through the radiology report. ‘How is your father?’ she asked after a while. ‘I hope he hasn’t had any more setbacks. I was a bit worried I might have done more harm than good when I went to the manor house yesterday.’

  ‘Is that what’s been bothering you?’ He made a wry face. ‘None of it was your fault, and I’m sorry he spoke to you the way he did. He’s been more tetchy of late and I think that’s down to his illness. His heart has been failing for some time, and he isn’t used to being so restricted and helpless. I’ve come to realise that all I can do is try to make his life more tolerable. It grieves me that it’s come to this, but in the end we just have to make the best of things.’